Society often portrays youth as the most desirable time in life. Don’t fall prey to this skewed image. Instead, realize that you have already lived through your youthful years, and you have learned a lot from them. Know that the person you are today is just as appealing as the person you were years ago. Once you pass the age of 65, you may find the thought of dating more than a little bit daunting.

Given her own experience, Roslyn, who at age 92 attended one of her daughter’s sexuality retreats, wondered why so few people talked about vibrators and masturbation. Then one night several years ago, she was in a restaurant with two friends after they attended a Broadway show. As the women talked about their sleep problems, Roslyn brought up her vibrator. She told them when she wakes up in the middle of the night, it helps her fall back to sleep.

I has just been a matter of fear really, of being compared to a prior significant partner. But I have considered widows, so that makes me a bit inconsistent, Lol. I agree that it seems to be much harder for women over 50 – or over 40 actually – to find men who are their equals AND who are interested in a serious relationship with them. It seems like these women feel that at least this is better than being alone. Someone who has enthusiasm in life and has energy.

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I’m an example of the exact opposite, and I wish there were more of us around for all of you good guys. My problem is that I can’t find a nice man like you. All I want is a life partner, lover, and companion. I don’t care what a man does for a living or what type of car he drives. I want to be with someone who has a kind heart.

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Because of my butt kicking on more than one front, I am pretty accepting of people and their unique differences. I am also one who is not into drama, and I prefer a simple life with some periodic adventures. I am a nature girl with one horse and two dogs, but my days of raising animals is over. If it wasn’t for the fact that my ex-husband wanted the dogs I wouldn’t even have them.

There is always something to deal with. People I understand all that has been said about surviving after divorce. We are forgetting about the money aspect in all this. I am 50, separated, soon to be divorced, 4 kids from 11 to 20. Active father, doting husband, in shape, blah blah. My wife told me that things have changed and that she must move on , Child support and alimony will total almost 4K a month.

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My gorgeous young friend was damaged goods. But instead of walking away, I continued to see him, because damaged or not, he was a wonderful and sweet person. While I struggled to date men my age or older, I ignored messages and dating requests from younger men. There was ick factor of dating men who were younger than my children. I had fears of scammers out to take the little money I had.

I’m not really saying that age doesn’t matter at all, just that it takes on a very different dimension in our later years, as you quite rightly point out. Many older adults have multiple needs for companionship. Sure, some are focused only on finding that single life partner who will give them a loving relationship for the next few decades.

I think once you get beyond a certain age difference it becomes more difficult to make a relationship work. Wisdom doesn’t always come with age, nor is what wisdom we may have universal to all aspects of existence/experience – we may have wisdom in some things but not others. From looking online it seems that somewhere between 30 and 50% of people have been in abusive relationships. I would think that with divorced people, the percentage would be higher. I firmly believe that men are just as likely to be victims of abuse as women but men are more likely to physically abuse their partner and women are more likely to emotionally abuse their partner. I also believe that many people in their 50’s either don’t want to admit or don’t even realize that they were abused, especially men.

Let him take you out to a nice romantic dinner, flash a little garter belt hook on your nylons at him.. And then let Nature take its course. If he’s turned on and you are fun and receptive it will be a good experience for both of you….and no Laborious Sex with you doing things you don’t want to… thats not good for either of you. No embarrassing, serious talks… relax, put on some soft music, have a little wine and let your bodies take over.

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